Skip to main content

Mother's Day: Loss and Gratitude

My Mother with my Grandad, William Ellery in Brooklyn, New York, Circa 1935- 1940
I've never spoken about my Mother, and it is still difficult to do. Mother was my best friend and staunchest supporter. Her love was boundless and strong. She loved children, and I think she would have liked to have had more than just me! 

The problem is that she died much too young at the age of 46, from alcoholism. Of course, at that time is was not spoken of much, nor  did we speak of the frequent, nightmarish, hospitalizations. Losing my Mother was a pain that never goes away. I miss her with every fiber of my soul - every day that I live. She would have been 84 now. I was 2 days past 21 when she died. Her loss has touched me at every turn and yet I am grateful to have had her as my mother. I think that she was too fragile for this world - too confined by the strictures of the 1950's and 60's. when women were expected to stay home . Looking back on my parents, I can see how my Mother and my Father were, at first attracted to each other. Opposites can attract. They had two very different personalties. Sometimes that can work, but in this case it sure didn't ! My father was an ambitious man, an architectural engineer. He made it well up the corporate ladder before he and my Mom split up. My Mother remarried  not too long after the split - and I think that her second husband was more suited to her - he was a superior fine artist and an advertising executive.  The problem with them all was alcohol - they were all alcoholics, and at that time it was socially very acceptable. No one thought twice about cocktails at lunch and more cocktails in the evening. No one thought much of drunken arguments that tainted the atmosphere of the house so often. So much promise in these three people. Promise that was impaired by drinking too much too often.

I'm not sure how I managed to escape that taint, but I think that my career in aviation, with it's constant drug tests, help to keep me away from substance abuse. I am so grateful that the gene seems to have passed me by!
Ellen Marie Ellery  1927-1973
You can see that my love for felines began early! We had two cats at this time. 
This one, a red and white ,lovable, male was named Haska, in honor of their 
artist friend Ray Prohaska. Our other cat was a Siamese . Mother had deep auburn hair.
My maternal grandmother was the best! She had the biggest influence on my life, especially after my Mother passed away. It was her love that really carried me through. I don't think that she ever really recovered form my Mother's death and she too died three years later . I miss her every moment of every day. Sometimes I feel as though I can still inhale her scent.

I am grateful to both my Mother and my Grandmother for their boundless love and eternal support. I am proud of them both! I just wish that they had stayed around a bit longer - selfish of me!
Thea Elizabeth Kavanaugh Ellery 1918-1976
This is an image I made from a circa 1924 portrait of my Grandmother.
 She had rich golden auburn hair!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Circular Knitting Needle Comparison

When I use something a lot I have to admit that I try to find the brand that works best for me. I never thought that I would ever be a scissor snob until I found Dovo brand scissors and, of course I love my trusty Fiskars too. I became a scissor snob thank to Dovo. 
Now I seem to be searching for the perfect knitting needles - the perfect one for me at least. I have been enjoying the 'chase' and I think I am close to knowing exactly what my preference is, and want, in a knitting needles. 
I only use circular knitting needles. When I first taught myself to knit myself  that's what I used and my preference has not changed. I began knitting with Addi Turbo needles. That is the brand that my LYS sold and I have always loved how slick and fast they are. I have sets of Addi clicks interchangeables in both lace and regular.  Over time, I have discovered what I want in a knitting needle: metal, the pointiest tip possible, a fast knitting, slick, metal needle and a very flexible c…

Fabric Stiffeners and Hardeners For All Occasions Plus A Recipe For Home Made Starch Alternative

I have had to become better acquainted with various ways to harden, stiffen or prevent fraying in cloth lately. It has been an enlightening journey, and I thought that I would pass it along the lessons that I have learned about a variety of excellent products that suit any need to 'tame' fabric for a variety of reasons. 
Fray Check. Who among us has not used this ubiquitous little potion over the years? It works like a charm to 'glue' up those raw edges on some of the most beautiful fabrics I use; ensuring that I can sew the fabric without fear of endless unraveling. This product has remained a favorite since I first discovered it many years ago. The only change that I think Prym/Dritz has made to it over the years is a finer application tip.
I have re-discovered my admiration for this product as I was making a holiday gift from some beautiful cotton that was especially prone to fraying! I have also recently learned that Fray Check can be removed with rubbing alcohol.…

Thread Matters and Easter Joy

My enchantmnt with embroidery continues unabated. Who knew?! I recently finished this 14" square; my interpretation of a pattern from Kathy Schmitz' book "Stitches From The Garden". She has another new book coming out soon called "Stitches For The Yuletide". I like her books because the designs can so easily be made your own. I have been working on some original designs (my own) lately and am looking forward to trying one of them soon. For quite a few years now I have been a fan of Wonderfil threads. My delight began innocently enough when I tried their luscious cotton thread called Konfetti. It's a 50 wt and is comparable to Superior Threads Masterpiece 50 wt cotton and Aurifil 50wt cotton, Konfetti has a lustrous, silky feel. For the record, I am also a fan of Masterpiece and Aurifil threads, but Wonderfil has developed some really unique thread lines and I cannot help jumping on their fan-wagon. I think that they have a unique line up of threads w…